A Prayer*
*This post also contains a curse word!
This is post 27 of Section II. To begin at the beginning, go here. Section II begins here
Jeff was more decisive. “Here,” he said, bending down, and he helped Gregory up on his knees.
“Thank you,” Gregory said. Then, as Jeff made no further move, he continued, “Could you give me a hand with these cords, buddy?”
But Jeff let go of him and took Chloe’s hand. “I’ll go you one better,” he said, kneeling himself and drawing Chloe down beside him. “I’m gonna pray for you.”
“What the—?”
Jeff cut him off. “Oh God our Heavenly Father,” he began. “We ask that You shine Your countenance on these two lost people, that You lead them to walk in Your ways and heal this family. We ask that You turn this home into a temple, filled with Your love, Lord. We ask You to forgive them their sins”—here he gave Gregory a meaningful glance—“ and grant them salvation, so that they will bring up little—Elizabeth?”—he looked questioningly at Chloe, who nodded—“Little Elizabeth to walk with You. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen,” he ended, and Chloe said, “Amen,” too, but Gregory was looking at them both in disbelief.
Then he began to laugh. “I think I’ve just seen the light.” (Jeff turned toward him hopefully.) “Chloe, I never would have believed it,” Gregory went on. “You’re fucking Jesus boy, right? Tell me, is sex really better with Jesus?”
Chloe was feeling cold and tired and mean. “Yes,” she said. “Watch him, please, Jeff. I’ll hurry.”
And she went upstairs to get some things together for her and for Elizabeth, who was at her grandmother’s.
Continue
This is post 27 of Section II. To begin at the beginning, go here. Section II begins here
Jeff was more decisive. “Here,” he said, bending down, and he helped Gregory up on his knees.
“Thank you,” Gregory said. Then, as Jeff made no further move, he continued, “Could you give me a hand with these cords, buddy?”
But Jeff let go of him and took Chloe’s hand. “I’ll go you one better,” he said, kneeling himself and drawing Chloe down beside him. “I’m gonna pray for you.”
“What the—?”
Jeff cut him off. “Oh God our Heavenly Father,” he began. “We ask that You shine Your countenance on these two lost people, that You lead them to walk in Your ways and heal this family. We ask that You turn this home into a temple, filled with Your love, Lord. We ask You to forgive them their sins”—here he gave Gregory a meaningful glance—“ and grant them salvation, so that they will bring up little—Elizabeth?”—he looked questioningly at Chloe, who nodded—“Little Elizabeth to walk with You. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen,” he ended, and Chloe said, “Amen,” too, but Gregory was looking at them both in disbelief.
Then he began to laugh. “I think I’ve just seen the light.” (Jeff turned toward him hopefully.) “Chloe, I never would have believed it,” Gregory went on. “You’re fucking Jesus boy, right? Tell me, is sex really better with Jesus?”
Chloe was feeling cold and tired and mean. “Yes,” she said. “Watch him, please, Jeff. I’ll hurry.”
And she went upstairs to get some things together for her and for Elizabeth, who was at her grandmother’s.
Continue
posted by Hobbes at 6:29 AM
5 Comments:
So many twists and surprises. I really don't know what to think now. This looks to me like a baptism by fire, jumping out of the fry pan into the flames. But she may be using the young kid to get out of her marriage and then she could get away from Mr. Soapy guy. But you might really believe that religion is the solution to all our problems in life, which I doubt you do, so I only suspect more surprises to come which keeps me in suspense. I like this part, it's good.
And I like this method or format for delivering the story. Tolstoy wrote Anna Karinin this way, by putting a short vignette of it in the paper each day and people flocked to the news stands to find out what happened to her next.
I still sit around at times trying to figure if you already have this all written and are feeding us bits each day or if you are making it up as you go. I guess the former. But I still feel personally that this part should have been at the beginning, then cut to Ed and the stupid gay guys. This part sounds like a really interesting story but the other seemed to me like character studies or bios. They were good, but just didn't have the hook this part does. I am thinking of Great Expectations where it had the exciting grave yard scene at the beginning that hooked me, then it went into the less interesting parts but I stayed to find out what happened with the convict guy.
Where are the flocks?
It's all written already.
See what you think in the end. There's some fun parts for the gay couple coming up.
The posts on Lula's blog is not for you. It is for Badgod and Crallspace and all those other guys she is at war with. But if you want to play along, you can make some nasty comments to her, but don't take her serious, please.
Lula: O. k.
T&I, Lula is definitely fourth-wall fiction.
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